“The average person is keeping 13 secrets right now. Five of them are secrets they’ve never told another living soul. These stats come from a new paper … which looked at more than 13,000 secrets over 10 different studies.” “The most common secret(s) that people shared with no one else were. Extra-relational thoughts (thinking something romantic or sexual about someone other than your partner), romantic desire, sexual behavior, and lies.” (More below)
Dirty Little Secret – All American Rejects (3:15)
A Gift from the Secret Scrolls Meditation (2:36)
What does Gibran imply you should do when finding someone with whom to share your secrets?
Previous research has shown that keeping secrets is linked to lower well-being. It was thought that the reason is just that many of our secrets are negative. And thinking about negative things is a bummer. That’s probably true (though it’s worth noting that positive secrets, like surprises, likely work differently). But this study found another reason, one more specific to secrecy.: Thinking of secrets means thinking of things you aren’t being open and honest about in your relationships. Which makes people feel less authentic.” (https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2017/05/shhhhh/526581/)
Comments
3 responses to “Precautions to take When Sharing, ‘The Secrets that Dare Not Speak their Name’ – Step 5”
I hate the felling of being forced to feel all over again. Id rather let the feeling go
I’ve gone to the extreme both ways regarding secrets. Today I must be neutral in that no ‘secret’ I have should ever be difficult to share with someone in conversation. If it comes up then I dont fight it finishing me off. That is the ego that fights against it. The result usually involves helping someone else.
It is just amazing to me that as I examine my own false pride, the shame associated with certain memories falls away. It’s like the scene in Back to the Future where one of the characters sees himself disappearing from a photograph, the memories lose shame, lose importance, lose their capacity to wring emotion from me. So much of my shame springs from not wanting to appear foolish or less than. I have to consciously discard false pride moment by moment, and, that allows me to be free. Namaste.